Connoisseurs of human souls, such as, for example, veterans of the secret services, argue that not a single person in the process of communication can remain a “closed book”. Sooner or later, something will force the pages to open up, and you are more or less likely to be able to read them and correctly interpret them. These are the tips given to us by those for whom secrets are an object of professional activity.
Determine the rate
People have different quirks and patterns of behavior. For example, they can clear their throats, look at the floor during a conversation, cross their arms, scratch their heads, sort their hair, mow their eyes, pout or shake their feet. Initially, we do not even notice this. And if we notice, then we do not attach any importance. However, people can exhibit this behavior for various reasons. Maybe it's just an ingrained habit. Or maybe an indicator of nervousness, distrust or aggression. Mentally create a profile for everyone with whom you have to deal, and place there the behavioral patterns and habits inherent in it, which can conditionally be considered the norm for a given person.
Pay attention to any deviations of a person from the norm prescribed in his profile. For example, your business partner has the habit of clearing his throat at the very beginning of the conversation. However, today, during a discussion of some of his new initiatives, he does this much more often than usual. It is worth paying attention to such changes in behavior and, perhaps, asking your partner more questions than you did before.
Notice gesture groups
Sometimes a single gesture does not mean anything, but if it goes in conjunction with others, then almost always it indicates some special state or hidden intention of the speaker. Returning to the business partner, we recall that he usually only clears his throat. But today, this was also added to frequent scratching of the head and swaying of the foot in the air. Double the caution.
Compare and contrast
So, you notice that someone is acting a little different than usual. Go up a notch to see if a person behaves the same way with someone other than you. Observe how he or she behaves with others in the room. Or how to answer a sudden incoming call. Does facial expression change? And what about posture and body language?
Do not forget about the mirror
In the human brain, there is something like mirror neurons that reflect the states of other people. You by default read the body language of the interlocutor. His smile activates the muscles in your face that are responsible for the smile, and a frowning expression makes you frown. Meeting someone you like, your eyebrows rise, your facial muscles relax, your head bends, and blood rushes to your lips, making them a little brighter and fuller than usual. Take a closer look at your partner’s face. If all this does not happen to him, the conclusions about his attitude towards you are obvious.
Find a strong voice
The most important person may not be sitting at the head of the table. Those with real power have strong, well-established voices. Not to be confused with a loud voice, which often, on the contrary, is a sign of weakness and insecurity. If you are trying to convey your idea to a group of people, you should not concentrate only on who is formally considered a leader. Hear all of these people, find the strongest voice, work on attracting exactly his voice to your side.
Follow the movements
Self-doubt people can easily be identified by abrupt and fussy movements, stooped posture and lowered head. But this does not mean that their ideas and considerations will be rubbish. If you have such subordinates, you probably will have to make a little more effort to “knock out” them, finally, their brilliant ideas.
A person can express the same idea in many different ways. Pay attention to what kind of words a person selects to convey this or that thought, and you will learn much more about him than perhaps he knows about himself. For example, he may say: “I get paid $ 500”, or “I earn $ 500”, or “I have a salary of $ 500”. In the first case, you have a passive person who is used to relying on others in everything, in the second - a person with an active lifestyle, and in the third - a lover of restrictions and clear rules.
A more detailed portrait of a person is not difficult. Just collect the answers to the following questions. Is he an introvert or an extrovert? What is more important for him - feelings or achievements? How does he relate to risk and uncertainty? What feeds his ego? How does he behave under stress? And in a relaxed state? Filling all these points in his profile, you will undoubtedly come closer to a better understanding of this person. A better understanding will lead to effective interaction.
How to read a person as a book?
The more we know about our customers, the more information we learn to read from their behavior, the easier it will be for us to find that lever in a person that we need to click on to convince a customer to buy our goods.
Scientists have found that more than 70% of the information that we perceive during dialogue is non-verbal information. When communicating, you must listen to the client, but in addition to listening, you also need to pay attention to how he says, how he behaves, what intonation and in what words he uses, in what position he stands and so on. Sometimes everything contradicts the client’s words: posture, gestures, and facial expressions.
In order for us not to make a mistake in the sales process, so that we do not spend our time on a person who is not interested, it is worth developing skills such as the ability to understand people and the dominants of their behavior, reading a person like a book, by its non-verbal signals.
The experts identified 4 main style of behavior. Usually one of behaviors will dominate human behavior, but there are situations when one of the secondary styles of behavior comes to the fore.
Style 1. Friendly (high level of responsiveness of the personality, but low level of assertiveness). People of this style are always leisurely when they make decisions and act. He loves emotionally close and intimate relationships. He does not like to conflict. Supports others, actively listens to them, but can be shy and excessively soft-bodied. He sets his goals with an eye on the opinions of others, is not independent. Often seeks support from loved ones and those around him. It works slowly, always looking at other people. Needs a sense of security, safety, community. Good adviser.
Style 2. Expressive (high level of responsiveness of the personality, high level of assertiveness). People of expressive style are inherent to make decisions spontaneously and do things. They like to participate in public affairs, but do not tolerate loneliness. They tend to exaggerate and generalize everything. Curious, optimistic, but at the same time, excitable and impatient. Great dreamers. They constantly jump from one thing to another, which can irritate people both at work and in life. They will prefer to work in a team, will do it quickly and with ardent enthusiasm. Longing for recognition of their performance and their own successes. They know how to convince, but they themselves are not very responsive.
Style 3. Analytical (low responsiveness and low assertiveness). People with a predominance of an analytical style of behavior are always cautious in making decisions and will necessarily consider their actions. In business and work they prefer order and organization. Do not meddle in other people's affairs. They like to solve objective and specific tasks at work, they are always diligent, persistent, systematic in their studies, but they can show excessive discrimination, tediousness and stubbornness. They always want to be right and rely too much on information when making decisions. They work slowly, carefully, prefer to do the work alone. They feel the need for security, for self-realization, they solve problems well.
Style 4. Commander (low responsiveness, high assertiveness). Commander-style people make decisive decisions and take active action. They try to control the situation themselves, they are distinguished by firmness, understanding, productivity, but they can be excessively uncompromising and intolerant. Try to work with maximum freedom of action. Cold, independent, like to compete. The advice of others is intolerant. They work well, quickly and efficiently, but preferably alone. They long for others and leadership to recognize their role and their successes. Good administrators and managers.
Before learn to read a person like a book, analyze your behavior. Do not spare your time for this - be sure to determine your behavior style. You need to do this, otherwise all the recommendations that we will describe in this part of the course will be useless.
It’s very important that you learn how to define these 4 types of behavior, learned the information and used it in their work.
Practical application of knowledge
So. Now we will put our knowledge into practice and answer such questions, how to understand people, how to read a person as a book.
Here is a customer. We need to determine to which category of styles his behavior belongs.
We determine the style of behavior by profession client
Who do you think might be "friendly" buyer? As a rule, these are religious figures, writers, journalists, Internet bloggers, cultural, educational and social workers. Representatives "Expressive" behaviors can be found in sports, politics, advertising, art, on television. "Commanders" prefer professions in the field of management, trade, law, these are entrepreneurs and representatives of law enforcement agencies. Analysts choose professions in the field of science, finance, accounting and banking, engineering professions.
Determine the style of behavior for clothes
People with "friendly»They prefer pastel or classic colors, don’t wear defiant and extravagant things, they are somewhat old-fashioned because they prefer convenience in clothes. Person "expressive»Warehouse dresses brightly and fashionably, sometimes excessively. "Analyst"- is conservative in clothes, buys high-quality gray or black things and wears clothes for a long time. "Commander”Is also conservative, but it follows fashionable functional trends, expressing its own status in clothes.
Determine the style of behavior on the car
“Expressive” personalities prefer cars with powerful engines, jeeps. Of the brands most like BMW and Honda. "Commanders" will prefer Mercedes classic black, white or silver. A “friendly” client will arrive at a meeting on a classic sedan or station wagon in blue, green or beige colors. “Analysts” love functional, but at the same time economical and durable cars. It can be Volkswagen, Volvo, Hyundai, Kia or other brands.
We determine the style of behavior for jewelry and hairstyle
“Expressive” natures like to wear jewelry, make model haircuts and sculptured shaving. “Commanders” are usually stylish personalities, but carry only functional accessories (watches, mobile phones, tablets). Representatives of the "friendly" style try to be invisible. “Analysts” like short haircuts or, conversely, wear long hair pulled in a bun.
After you understand your communication style, and also learned to figure out which communication style dominates your client, try to adapt to it. If he’s from the “friendly” category, then take the time to just chat with him. Do not go straight to the point.
Understand that if you learn to adapt to the style of behavior that dominates your client, you will significantly increase your sales. To do this, you need to work out (fill your hand, train) 4 types of answers and behavior for buyers of each of the behaviors. Over time, you will begin to control the process of "tuning" for the client and it will seem extremely interesting to you.