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How to make a best man toast

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Orator.ru Oratory and communication skills

Issue 10 Newsletter Archive
HOW TO THINK AND pronounce toasts

Some students of the courses of oratory and communication skills in the second lesson said this:

“Once I made a toast. Shortly before that, I specially drank a glass for courage, but only did it in vain - my tongue began to weave and thoughts began to get confused. Then I was ashamed of what I said then”

“I am the leader and therefore often have to decline invitations to various parties and banquets, because I’m afraid that they will try to force me to make a toast there. I don’t know how to do this and I’m afraid to hit my face with dirt”

"I made toasts many times, but they are kind of uninteresting to me."

“On March 8, I was supposed to congratulate the women of our department. When, in the conclusion of my toast, I congratulated them on the New Year, then I realized that it was time for me to take you to courses”

Many people are shocked by the situation when they hear the knock of a metal fork on some wine glass, accompanied by the words: “wait a minute!”. And then: "now let's listen to what the esteemed Sidor Palych will tell us!" Usually after these words there is oppressive silence. Sidor Palych, who fell into the unenviable position of the victim, remains alone with many pairs of attentive eyes, which for him are in a fog, with one single thought in his head: "I would like to fall through the ground better now." Keep in mind that some people like to watch sacrifices (I think that this pleasure was laid in their nature by ancient ancestors, who demanded bread and circuses. Spectacles! It doesn’t matter whether they are funny or sad). Therefore, they deliberately create such awkward situations for other people.

So that such sudden offers do not overshadow our holiday, let's arm ourselves with a useful theory - let's talk about some rules for pronouncing toasts. Be patient and read everything to the end. You will see that constructing a pleasant toast is quite simple and, I think, you will soon be able to verify this in practice.

To start forget beaten toasts like: “so that we had everything and that we don’t have anything for it”, “God forbid that tomorrow too” and other hackneyed verbiage, relevant in the entrance. Also try to do without popular book toasts, for if you start to make a toast that any of the listeners can finish, you will be a boring sight. This is commonplace. A toast is good when it’s not serial, but unique, so follow the most important rule for making toasts: make a toast yourself .

How to choose a theme? This is a crucial moment, so first, let's have a little supporting training. Keep in mind that a nine-tenths person remembers what he directly participated in, so I will ask you to honestly do what I ask. In fact, everything will be quick and easy. Let’s try together, just to smoothly link two different concepts into one coherent story, for example, “minister” and “puddle”. As an example, I’ll give three ways that came to my mind:

  1. One person told me: "I am sure that I will become the Minister of Economics." In fact, he cannot even be sure that he will not choke in a puddle,
  2. Bribes fill the minister’s pocket like a rain puddle
  3. The Minister of Railways, apparently, believes that every road should be decorated with a puddle.
Come up with your own version (remember that now we have training with you).

I understand that they have already come up with. Something like a minister sat in a puddle? Good. Mini-training is over.

And now let's remember the conclusion from it: any two topics can be organically linked into one short story in millions (!) Of various ways. This axiom is useful to us a little later. Read it (in italics) again.

Move on. We need to build a toast composition. There may be a thousand options. In my opinion, one of the most interesting is the scheme, which let's now call " NE "(" TALE - OUTPUT ") - first we tell the so-called TALE, and then we make OUTPUT from it. We will consider it (the" CB "scheme) in this issue.

TALE - this is a small interesting, witty story for the seed:

  • some kind of story
    - Two and a half thousand years ago, after the death of the Persian king Cyrus, an inscription was installed on his grave, which read: “O man, whoever you are and wherever you come from, for I know that you will come, I - Cyrus, who created the Persian power. But do not deprive me of that handful of earth that covers my body, "
    - "Mademoiselle de Sommery, being caught by her lover at the crime scene, bravely denied it, and when he began to get excited, she said:" Ah, I see very well that you stopped loving me, you believe more in what you see than in what what I say "" (Stendhal)
    - Sigmund Freud, in response to a question from his students if there is anything symbolic in the fact that he smokes large cigars, he replied: "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar."
  • a case from life ("Last winter, when I was resting in the Tundra ..."),
  • joke ("Stirlitz somehow went for eggs ..."),
  • curious thought:
    - The most ancient Egyptian pharaoh Menes never found out that he went down in history as the first of all people.
  • Notable fact or information:
    - In the entire history on Earth, 76 billion people were born and 70 billion of them died, and the difference - 6 billion - is modern humanity,
    - Uranus in the Webster’s 1903 dictionary was called "useless metal,"
    - At the end of the 20th century, one of the greatest events of the century happened, which many did not notice: in the year 360 of its existence, the Great Fermat’s Theorem was finally proved,
    - According to experts, the problem of the "ozone hole" does not exist. She was fanned by the Dupons, who earned tens of billions of dollars on her,
    - The notorious 25th frame, which, although prohibited by the laws of many countries, is actually exaggerated by the yellow press,
  • aphorism (serious or not so):
    - "The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step" (Confucius),
    - "Nobody is your friend, nobody is your enemy, but every person is a teacher" (I don’t remember who),
    - "If the theory of relativity is confirmed, then the Germans will say that I am German, and the French - that I am a citizen of the world, but if my theory is disproved, the French will declare me German and the Germans Jewish" (Albert Einstein),
    - “They are not born a woman, they become her” (Simone de Beauvoir),
    - “A woman can make any man a billionaire a millionaire” (Charlie Chaplin),
    - "I always said that a woman should be like a good horror movie: the more space left for the imagination, the better" (Alfred Hitchcock),
    - “If my father was bolder, I would be three years older” (Marcel Achard),
    - "Now they write so much about the dangers of smoking that I firmly decided to quit reading" (Joseph Cutten),
    - "Youth is a flaw that passes quickly" (Goethe),
    - “We will achieve peace, even if for this we have to fight” (Dwight Eisenhower),
    - "I only know one thing: that I am not a Marxist" (Karl Marx)
  • interest Ask:
    - Why dung beetles are not aware of the origin of their dung heap ?,
    - One chess player sneezed and painfully hit his forehead against the queen. Should chess be considered an extreme sport?

Important detail: it is desirable that the TALE have answers to questions: who? what? when? where? what did? what came of it? and others (in a word - the images (vivid pictures)). For example, when we hear: "Once I was walking in the park and suddenly, right in front of me, it was not clear where I came from ...", then this beginning of the TALE is nothing but the answers to the questions: when? - one day, Who? - I am, what have you been doing? - walked Where? - through the park, what happened - someone came ... Such information is perceived more easily than, say, this: "when it comes to the mind, the nervous system does not integrate by centralizing around a dogmatic cell, instead it produces a multi-million dollar democracy, each unit of which is a cell."

TALES harmoniously interwoven with speech are good in that they attract the attention of listeners and are remembered better than general phrases and dry information in a protocol style. Why do children love fairy tales? Why are fiction novels with detectives read at their leisure, and all sorts of textbook guides, as a rule, are only reluctantly necessary on the eve of an exam? Because in fairy tales, novels and detective stories are present the images - events and characters, i.e. answers to the above questions.

The conclusion from the TALE, as a rule, should be relevant for the celebration, for example: "... for our Grigory Alekseevich, who, like an apple, fell by the way on our head, it is a pity that the Law of Universal Gravity is already open!". CONCLUSION sometimes (especially when they already drank for Grigory Alekseevich eight times in a row) may simply concern eternal values ​​that are relevant at all times, for example: "... therefore, gentlemen, so that our potency is in order, let's stand up and let’s drink for our lovely ladies! "(though, such a CONCLUSION is appropriate, say, among friends, an unfamiliar audience may recognize it as vulgar). Needless to say, the CONCLUSION should carry a positive emotional charge and flow naturally from the TALES?

And now it's time to recall our axiom, for which we started that little training: from any "fairy tale" you can draw many different conclusions, as well as the same conclusion can be drawn from different "fairy tales". As you can see, our task when choosing a toast theme is very simple - from a huge number of combinations of TALES with CONCLUSIONS, we need to choose only one. You just need to strain your imagination and come up with or recall an interesting TALE and noteworthy CONCLUSION from it - and the toast is ready.

What to do before: come up with a TALE or CONCLUSION? At first glance, it might seem that the toast is invented in the same sequence as it is pronounced, i.e. First you need to find a TALE, and then make an OUTPUT from it. Actually, it doesn’t matter - it can be both, and so. For example, it’s more convenient for me to start from the end: first come up with a CONCLUSION and pick up a TALE for it, although it happens the other way around.

What is the regulation? There are no definite recommendations for all occasions, but some are still available. Lingering Georgian-style toasts are appropriate when your listeners currently have no more interesting activity than listening to you, or when the company at the table suffers from a lack of communication and everyone is silent. If everyone is relaxed and everyone has fun, then most often it’s undesirable to stretch the toast for longer than one minute. Take a look at your listeners and you will understand by their faces when it is time for you to round off. When the toast is delayed, the listeners begin to get bored - they fidget, are distracted, and sadly smile at each other from the awkwardness of the speaker, who, as if nothing had happened, is flooded with a nightingale, stealing a piece of life from each of them. Also a sad sight. therefore finish the toast before the listeners want it . Exhaust the topic, not the patience of the audience.

Toast is a public speech, therefore all elements of public speech should be inherent in the toast: a confident tone, sufficient volume, a look into the eyes of the audience, energy appropriate to the atmosphere of the holiday and etc.

Toast according to the "CB" scheme can be invented in two minutes. You can use your previous blanks if the participants in the holiday have not heard them yet. Try not to repeat yourself.

A few toasts according to the "CB" scheme:

(This toast is conveniently pronounced after the first holiday toast)

FAIRY TALE:
Once an acquaintance was late for a meeting with Leo Tolstoy. Justifying, he said:
- Please excuse me, Lev Nikolayevich, I stayed at a meeting of the Sobriety Society.
- What is the Society of sobriety? Tolstoy asked. - This is when they gather in order not to drink? But you don’t need to get ready for this, and if you are ready, you need to drink.
OUTPUT:
Apparently, we are not sobriety here. So, let's drink, comrades (officers, plumbers, gynecologists, teachers, pianists, shoemakers, alcoholics - underline what you need)!

FAIRY TALE:
"You can’t love all women, but you should strive for this," said Brazilian writer-communist Jorge Amado.
OUTPUT:
Let us gently and warmly love our women!

FAIRY TALE:
One of my buddies was about to fly into space for a long time, another - to learn Chinese, a third - to stop swearing. But until now, the first one walks on Earth, the second one does not know a single hieroglyph, and the third one swears. And you know why? Because they all tried to start a new life on Monday, and there were 52 of them in the year, and they did not know which one to choose.
OUTPUT:
But the New Year only happens once a year, so the choice is simpler here: we simply have no choice. For the New Year we achieved what we wanted!

4 (A toast with the involvement of the audience, well invigorates the friendly company)

FAIRY TALE:
Friends! Let's sit back, close our eyes and relax. And let's remember some of our dreams, which remained unfulfilled last year. It can be, for example, admission to the university, a million, a hamster or your other tactical goal. Let us mentally imagine her image as specifically as possible - in detail and in all its glory. Presented? We continue to sit as relaxed, with our eyes closed, and listen to me carefully.
OUTPUT:
After we all together, with a loud chorus, utter a command that word that I will tell you soon, each of us will receive a powerful attitude towards the achievement of our dreams and it will come true this year. I repeat: she will come true necessarily. So, (pause), let's all together shout together: “Noticed!”, Three to four:
- NOTED.
- Well. And now we fix the installation of champagne! (everyone clinks glasses).
(Such an elementary involvement of those present brings revitalization into their ranks, and their eyes begin to shine for them, like for children, and one of them will certainly ask: “Give something else!”).

I’ll tell you frankly, friends, that I don’t like many toasts and congratulatory speeches. As a rule, these are empty words and hypocrisy shines through them. In connection with the New Year celebrations, one editor-in-chief of a TV channel told viewers: "... so that there will be less bad news and more good news in the new year." It would seem, well, and what’s wrong with that - quite a decent wish. But many journalists and TV presenters who knew the chief editor well when he heard such words from him choked because they remembered his unhealthy tendency to search for "fried" facts and his teachings, which were his motto: "the main thing is not just to present shocking information and present it so that the viewer has a feeling of hopelessness! " They perfectly understood that in fact the editor-in-chief was going to live under this motto in the new year, so they saw all the falsity of his words. Often people wish each other "the very best," and then forget about it, and their lives, as before, are filled with petty quarrels, intrigues, envy and anger towards those people whom they congratulated recently. Sometimes drunken showdowns begin right at the table or a little at a distance, shortly after making solemn speeches. Ugly. Therefore, I do not like many toasts.

But still, sometimes, like pearls in a pile of garbage, no, no, and some simple words spoken from the heart will flash. You recognize them unmistakably - they take you into a gentle embrace, from which the soul becomes warm, and a pleasant thrill runs through every cell of your body. You feel that this is not a common idleness, but words expressing the true thoughts of the speaker. Therefore, friends, try to follow one more rule of pronouncing toasts: say what you really think .

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